Monday, September 17, 2012

Alimony/Miscellanious




September 17, 2012



Occasionally I'll receive a check in the mail entitled alimony/miscellaneous. What's the miscellaneous mean, I wonder? When I first got one I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Won't he know from seeing my name on the check? Does he think maybe he will forget in the future that we were married and wonder who received this cancelled check? Or is it yet another way to turn the knife?

Maybe the miscellaneous is for all the nights I cried when he didn't come home, or all the years I felt like a single parent because he was always at work. Or maybe it's for all the parent-teacher conferences I went to by myself, the sick visits to the doctor when they couldn't go to school and I couldn't go to work. Maybe its for all the anxiety I had when there was a snow day and school was cancelled and I had to figure out who would care for my children. He always thought I "worried" too much. But he just got into his car and went to work no matter what the issue. He could NEVER call in sick.

Thirty years of memories and joys and sorrows reduced to "miscellaneous."


2 comments:

  1. If I were you, I wouldn’t mind what he writes in the check for as long as he sends me the correct amount of alimony. You shouldn’t waste more time on things that might hurt you. Whatever reason he has for writing “miscellaneous” on the check he sends you is his problem. Spend that money on your kids; treat yourself to a nice wine and steak dinner in a fancy restaurant; or have a full body massage. Cheer up and be strong, sister!

    Louisa Matsuura

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  2. I felt sad as I read your story. I could really feel the pain he caused you. “Maybe the miscellaneous is for all the nights I cried when he didn't come home, or all the years I felt like a single parent because he was always at work…”--- Aww. You had a lot of “maybes” there, but I really hope that you don’t mind these things now. I think receiving that check simply tells you that you really need to move forward. There’s no sense in wallowing in hurt. Move ahead! There are still the good things around you.

    Janay Stiles

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