Friday, June 27, 2014


June 27, 2014

I recently saw a quote on Facebook about boobs. "They prove that men can think about two things at once." I'm not sure that's actually true but it's funny. But breasts are so much more than that. Besides the clearly sexual part they are made for comfort and nourishment. Nourishing babies. I'm not into the toddler thing but to each their own. I don't think you have to whip out your breast at a restaurant or other public place to feed you child. I'm sure that can be done in public in a discreet way. I have in fact seen it done that way many times. And comfort...there is nothing like putting your head down on a soft pillowy breast.

Last week I went for my yearly mammogram. You haven't lived until you have been naked from the waist up, your boob being kneaded by the Xray tech and then pressed in a vise with your face smashed against the plexiglass screen. "Take a deep breathe." Really, I haven't been breathing since you clamped me in here! A few years ago I had to have a needle biopsy. I clearly remember the doctor, a male, tell me I shouldn't feel anything. Then he proceeded to use what can only be described as a nail gun to excise some breast tissue. I almost hit the roof. "That hurt?", he said with a hint of disdain. Hell yes, it hurt. Lets try doing that to your scrotum, I thought. Since he was still holding the gun I refrained from saying it out loud but I never forgot it!

Breast of my biggest fears. So I faithfully go for my mammograms every year. Yesterday I got my report in the mail. The girls are fine and they are not dense!! Yeah for me. Since most breast lumps are found by a woman's partner I have been trying to remember to do self exams more frequently. So if you see me grabbing my chest, I'm only checking for lumps!

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