Sunday, August 5, 2012

We don't have to get divorced

August 8, 2012

Yes, that's what he said when he was leaving me the Sunday after Thanksgiving. Sunday morning was always special for me. I would get up before anyone else and start the coffee, read my email and throw in a load of laundry. Then I would get the newspapers. Dave would get up late ( he used to like to sleep late. That is, until he had to run to catch the Port Jeff ferry to be back before I returned from work.) He would get bagels because they "had to be fresh." That Sunday we were supposed to leave to spend a few days in Manhattan. He was acting skittish and I finally asked him what was wrong. " I don't love you enough. "

Wow. Nothing like that to bolster your self esteem. I was already feeling old and haggard. That was just the icing on the cake!" But we don't have to get divorced. We can still keep our bank account and I will continue to pay the bills from there." I wasn't sure I had heard him correctly. "So let me get this right," I asked." You will live somewhere else and sleep with someone else and I will stay here?" His response, " Well, I'm doing that now." Yes, thank-you for that.

I will admit I briefly considered that proposal. I didn't know how I could possible survive without his overseeing our financial affairs. Maybe if I didn't have a daughter to think about I would have even agreed. But she already saw me as weak and beaten and I didn't want to give her any more reason to continue with that sentiment. The next week I talked to a lawyer. What did Dave say to that? "I didn't think you would ask for alimony!!!"

Incredible, I know. What I want to know is, was the Kussi (Farsi) so desperate to have him that she would agree to such a setup. She would live with a married man and let him support her? But I guess she was doing that anyway. As Jennie would have said," She must have grown up in a barn."

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