The Divorce Excuse

October 31, 2012



How much longer can I use the divorce as an excuse for things that go wrong? I say a year from when the divorce was final. So that gives me until June 22 of next year. Of course I used it before then to explain why I wasn't smiling for months. And if you ever want to clear a room you really just have to say, "I'm going through a very painful divorce." It helps if your voice shakes a little and your eyes well up. The place becomes utterly silent. People scatter like crazy. Except of course for Judge Blue who was very unsympathetic to my plight. But I was amazed at how effective it was as a tool for stopping unpleasant conversations.

Of course, some people think it is time for me to stop using the divorce as a crutch. Why? I say milk it for as long as I can. After all I'm not the same person I was before this started. I don't think I'm a better or worse person but a different person certainly. And I think that is a direct result of this experience.

So I say the statue of limitations is one whole year. It still colors everything that happens to me and affects the way I react to new situations. It is always there in the back of my mind. Now that I'm thinking about it a year may not be long enough. Only kidding, Red! June 22, 2013 is the absolute last day I will use the divorce excuse.