Medical mission

January 23, 2012



Yesterday was our second day of surgery. The kids are adorable, the parents grateful and the adults we operate on have sometimes waited years for their surgery. There is virtually no complaining, none that we can understand anyway,and the teamwork on these trips is amazing. Everyone working together for a common goal. Sharing supplies, food and advice. The PACU is usually the place where people congregate after they are done with their cases and sometimes when they are having a "moment." The young people on the trip ( residents, medical students and younger nurses) are usually cared for by those of us who are more experienced. Many times the relationships last after the mission is over. ( Sometimes you even meet the person you will leave your wife for) So much for dedication to your patients.

But seriously, you learn a lot on these trips. Not just how to cheat on your wife, but how basic emotions are common to every culture. The love of a parent for their children, the desire to make a better life for them and their joy when they see them after surgery is universal in any society. It makes you realize just how alike we all really are, no matter your race, religion or color.

And no matter how I kid about what happened to me personally these trips are so satisfying it is more than worth giving up your vacation and working long hours. As I've said before and I think I can speak for everyone we get a lot more than we give.

First Day

We are finally here after two days of traveling. Thai people are so warm and hospitable. There was a welcoming committee waiting for us at the hotel with flowers and music for the team. And they love to feed us. Usually we lose weight on these missions but I doubt we will this time. When we got to our rooms we found a welcome packet and name tags. Today we set up our rooms and screened patients. Will probably be too busy to write much but I will try to post pictures on Facebook.

Fighter

January 17, 2012

Dedicated to David Graboff and Anita Pedulla
Thank-you for helping me become the person I am today.



                                                    "Fighter"  by Christina Aguilera

After all that you put me through,
You think I'd despise you,
But in the end I wanna thank you,
'Cause you've made me that much stronger

Well I thought I knew you, thinkin' that you were true
Guess I, I couldn't trust called your bluff time is up
'Cause I've had enough
You were there by my side, always down for the ride
But your joy ride just came down in flames 'cause your greed sold me out in shame

After all of the stealing and cheating you probably think that I hold resentment for you
But uh uh, oh no, you're wrong
'Cause if it wasn't for all that you tried to do, I wouldn't know
Just how capable I am to pull through
So I wanna say thank you
'Cause it

[Chorus:]
Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
It makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter

Never saw it coming, all of your backstabbing
Just so you could cash in on a good thing before I'd realize your game
I heard you're going round playing the victim now
But don't even begin feeling I'm the one to blame
'Cause you dug your own grave
After all of the fights and the lies 'cause you're wanting to haunt me
But that won't work anymore, no more,
It's over
'Cause if it wasn't for all of your torture
I wouldn't know how to be this way now and never back down
So I wanna say thank you
'Cause it

[Chorus]

How could this man I thought I knew
Turn out to be unjust so cruel
Could only see the good in you
Pretend not to see the truth
You tried to hide your lies, disguise yourself
Through living in denial
But in the end you'll see
YOU-WON'T-STOP-ME

I am a fighter and I
I ain't gonna stop
There is no turning back
I've had enough

[Chorus]

You thought I would forget
But I remembered
'Cause I remembered
I remembered
You thought I would forget
I remembered
'Cause I remembered
I remembered

[Chorus]

Anderson Cooper

January 15, 2012



Last night Anderson Cooper's show was about the Newtown tragedy and gun control. First of all let me say that the parents who spoke were simply amazing. Composed and eloquent they talked about their children without bitterness at the situation. I admire them.

I am not religious or political. I like to think I live by the Golden Rule. Treat others as you would like to be treated. Use common sense and your conscience. Although I have lived long enough to learn that some people do not have a conscience. (Two come to mind right off the bat) Assault rifles do not belong in anyones home no later what side of the gun issue you belong. Assault rifles are for assaults.

Don't ask "What would Jesus do?" Ask "What SHOULD I do?" All actions have consequences and rationalizing bad behavior and blaming it on religion or other people in your life is just a cop out. If everyone would start to take responsibility for their actions the world would be a better place.

Trip Anxiety

January 14, 2012



This past week has been very hectic. I have been trying to prepare for my trip to Thailand. Getting our supplies together for the PACU, making sure we have enough medications etc, and packing my own clothes. Also paying the bills before I go, making sure my sister is cared for, getting her meds and leaving emergency numbers. Leaving instructions for the kids and generalized worrying about EVERYTHING!

I usually get trip anxiety before I go away. I start to imagine all sorts of things that could go wrong. Plane, illness, bad weather here, tsunamis there!!! But I've been too busy to worry about that this time. I had to work all weekend. I was initially concerned I wouldn't have time to get my last minute things done but it actually worked out OK. I don't have TIME to worry about anything. Whatever isn't done just won't get done until I get back, or someone else will have to do it. All I can think of is 18 hours on the plane and no one will be able to get to me and I won't be able to obsessively check on things!!! No phone calls, texts or emails. Heaven.

I'm planning to bring my Ipad and will make an attempt at posting blogs. Mainly I will be talking about the kids and trying to post their pictures. Although I notice I don't get as many readers if I don't talk about sex. But I hope you will still read about the incredibly fulfilling experience I will have caring for children who otherwise wouldn't receive this life changing surgery.

As Long As You Love Me

January 11, 2012


Justin Bieber. Adorable, isn't he? Such a little boy and already a millionaire. Is he talented? I suppose so. I enjoy some of his music but can't get past his age. How old is he anyway?

But I did like his song, "As Long As You Love Me." How sweet and romantic. But then I really thought about the lyrics. "We can be starving, we can be homeless, we can broke." Not so much.

Maybe when I was seventeen. Maybe when I was too headstrong to listen to my mother's advice about love and relationships. About how someone's family and upbringing can affect their outlook on all their other connections. About how easy it would be to walk away from your family.

But not now. I can't be starving, homeless OR broke. For anyone. Even you George. (Although I suspect you could afford me!) I can't ever "give up everything" for anyone. Because everything means too much to me now. The people who remain in my life are too precious to leave behind for anyone.

Rape in India

January 10, 2012



Ah, India. A place I have always wanted to visit. The exotic colors and smells. The Taj Mahal. The Indian food that I love. The refined and calming atmosphere I have come to know from the people I have met here in the U.S.

How disturbing to read of the way women are actually treated in India today. The brutal rape and death of a young women in India recently is unbelievable. From what I have been reading women in India cannot go out after dark unaccompanied ( or in this case even the presence of a male companion was not a deterrent)  for fear of assault. Not the idea of the India I had conjured up in my head. Again, I am astounded at how naive I really am.

The only thing that is different about this rape is that people are responding. The men have been caught but if they will be brought to justice is still in question. People are protesting in the street. Apparently women are not thought of in high regard in India. Or for that matter in many countries. It can still be argued that even in the U.S. we are "second class citizens." Why? Women worldwide need to stand up for themselves and REAL men need to support them. Women should not be afraid to leave there homes after dark for any reason. Men who defile them should be brought to justice. But more importantly men should be taught to respect women as equals. Not as possessions, sexual conquests or inferiors. We are your mothers, sisters and wives.

So as a single woman I will put off traveling to India. I just don't feel safe.