Rent A Husband

October 28, 2013



I've come to learn there are many aspects to cobbling together a "husband for rent." All the jobs that were divided up when I was married are still here. Just waiting to be accomplished. The bills, the yard work, the car, the plumbing, the cellar, the kitty litter, the garbage.... all the things HE took care of before. All my responsibility now.



Some tasks are easier than others. I can pay the bills on line (whoever would have thought! ) and the kitty litter is no big deal. I drag the garbage and the recyclables down to the curb every week, and when there is a bug anywhere Hilary calls me and I take care of it. I even disposed of the dead mice, although I used a shovel and tried not to look at them as I brought them outside. They were kind of cute and I considered giving them a proper burial but didn't have the time.


But the big things I've had to hire out. Steve takes care of my car and he never said a word when I brought it in a year after it was purchased and confessed that I had never had the oil changed or a tune up. Not because I didn't want to but because it just never occurred to me. Was I supposed to put snow tires on a four wheel drive? I didn't do that either. I watched the sink in Hilary's bathroom leak for weeks but only when the shower handle broke and she couldn't shut off the water did I call Gino. He came that afternoon and the next day with a new faucet that he picked out after I assured him I would love whatever he bought. And I did. Everything fixed now. And Brian. My outdoor person who is slowly becoming my all around handy man husband. He not only does the landscaping but fixed my door, painted the water stain on the ceiling from the leaky shower, and organized the shed outside. I've even let him down into the basement. It's such an embarrassment that it took me weeks to work up the courage to ask him if he could help me straighten it out.


But there are somethings that you can't purchase. At least I can't. I'm sure if I went I Craigslist I could find just about anything I needed. There is still an opening for a "conversation husband" who wants to talk to me just because I AM me. Someone who really "gets" me. Someone who will listen to me talk about my day and the funny stories I have to share. Someone who will look past the sarcastic, jaded comments to see that I am so much more than that. Maybe that "You complete me person" will remain elusive forever. Maybe there is no such thing.

Hot Water

January 8, 2012



Yesterday I ran out of hot water. Not because I was running all the appliances and showering at the same time. But Hilary and I should be able to shower at the same time, right? I went downstairs with my LED flashlight to investigate. Uh oh, water on the floor near the hot water heater. I called Gino, my plumber. He was coming that afternoon to fix my bathroom toilet. He talked me through shutting off the valve on the heater and waited while I measured it and gave him the serial numbers. Then he ordered a new hot water heater and had it delivered in the afternoon.

I met Gino when he came to hook up the water line for my beautiful refrigerator. The one I still say good night to when I go to bed. Gino was another perk from that purchase. Anyway when he got here and went downstairs he said,"Is that all the water that came out?" Is there a requirement? I guess there is. He didn't think anything was wrong with the heater. After checking things out, flushing the line and fixing my toilet he went back down and declared the heater was fine. It may have just "run over." Then he started saying things about plumbing and upkeep I didn't understand. All I knew was that I had hot water again.

But now we had to get the heater up the stairs. I talked the strong young man who brought it to take it downstairs. Gino said he would return another day with help. "I can help you." After all I got the desk up the stairs with Josh and I am working on my upper body strength at the gym!! Well, we did bring it up one step at a time. I apologized for maybe over reacting but he was very gracious. Only charging me for the toilet and not the aggravation of the heater. And now I can do the laundry!!!