Fidelity. Unnatural?

December 4, 2012



Last week one of the physicians I work with told me that fidelity was "unnatural." His words, not mine. Wow, I wish I knew that 35 years ago, when I was young and my body parts weren't trying to defy gravity. If I had known it was "unnatural" to be faithful my life may have taken a completely different track.

I would have to say that being faithful to one person is hard but not impossible. At least I would like to think that. I know that it was hard for me but I managed to not have an affair (or two) during my marriage as tempting as it would have been. But I could never bring myself to follow through. I knew I would not be able to face my husband or live with myself. And in the end, when we are all alone, what is left but self-respect.

It was also implied that I was anti men. Not true! I LOVE men. They are essential for the continuation of the species(at this point in time anyway.) It is wonderful to have them around to take out the garbage, change the kitty litter and put gas in the car. But all kidding aside, I loved being part of a "couple." I loved having an intact family. I would like to think that there are many men who are capable of being faithful to one woman. But fidelity alone is not enough. Love, loyalty and respect are also important. But maybe I set the bar too high.

So...is it unnatural to expect fidelity in a relationship? Equally so for women as for men? Please let me in on the latest thinking. I would like to be prepared for my next relationship.

Faithful Women Wanted

November 7, 2012



Whenever I sign into my gmail account I am treated to ads. The first time I noticed that they were somewhat specific to my life I freaked out! After I looked up information on Hong Kong I started noticing ads for things to do there. Who was monitoring my activities??? How did they know I was planning a trip to Asia? Then I started paying more attention. Ads for nursing jobs and things to do in Manhattan started to appear. OMG. Big brother was finally here.

Now, whenever I sign in, one of the ads is always from a site called seniorpeoplemeet.com. REALLY? Now I'm a SENIOR!!! And it always starts with Faithful Women Wanted. Why just faithful women? Is it because men can't BE faithful? In my case I'm just looking for an honest man. At least if you are going to cheat on me be honest about it. Don't tell me you were out Christmas shopping.

Maybe I can start a new web site called MATUREmenwanted. Are there any out there?

Mr. and Mrs. Redbird

October 23, 2012



One thing I was determined not to relinquish was my bird feeders. Although I was not the one to maintain them I love looking at the birds. My particular favorite is my cardinal couple. They are here all year long but in the winter with the snow in the background they are spectacular.

The male is of course the bright red of the couple. The female is a reddish brown so she is not so visible to predators. The male feeds the female during courtship and she makes the nest and of course has the babies. Just like humans. But unlike humans, cardinals mate for life. It makes me sort of happy to know that at least some birds can be faithful and trustworthy. The human race should take note.

Now if I can only figure out how to outwit the damn squirrels. I have moved the bird feeder three times, bought a squirrel baffle and new poles. But they STILL get to the feeders. This weekend I decided to put out food just for them and thought I had the problem solved. But I left a 25 lb bag of sunflower seeds in the garage with the door open and guess who nibbled through the bag and was in my garage cheerfully eating away? My nemesis, the squirrel! Oh well. Maybe I should just learn to live them.