July 12, 2012
Enough self pity for awhile. This will be all about ice cream! And that beats self pity any day. Not to say those days are over. I know better than that. I still have my birthday and anniversary to get through. But ice cream will be there for those days too.
Last week Hilary and I tried Pralines in Wallingford. I had been by that area many times and did not know there was an ice cream shop on Route 5 in a little strip mall. It's a cute place with a party room in the back. I had Reeses peanut butter cup and Hilary had cookie dough. We rated it at a 7.0. It was creamy, no ice ( Josh's criteria! ) but just ok.
Yesterday to commemorate the non birthday day Hilary and I went out to Frankies Diner in Bridgeport for a quick lunch. I don't really know the area but we were headed to Timothy's for ice cream.
Timothy's is in the Black Rock section of Bridgeport. It has a country store decor and tables inside to enjoy your selection. Again, good ice cream but nothing very special. I had the Black Rock, french vanilla with chocolate-covered almonds and Hilary had sweet cream. Another 7.0. Good but not something I would drive back there to get in the future.
Wentworths and Walnut Beach Creamery are still our favorites. I'm sure there are many who do not agree with our ratings. This is truly an arbitrary system. Not something to seriously consider on your own ice cream adventures!
Thursday, July 12, 2012
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
Happy Birthday, Dave
July 11, 2012
Another difficult day. Today is my ex-husband's birthday. So hard to say, ex-husband. I can only suppose it will get easier with time, like all things.
Birthdays are very special days to me. When the kids were small I always made their bed on their birthday. It was the one chore I insisted they do before they left for school or camp ( couldn't stand an unmade bed ) but on their birthday I would do it for them. I would always cook their favorite dinner or let them pick their favorite restaurant and invariably we would have ice cream cake for dessert. We always sang Happy Birthday and had candles and wishes. I did the same for Dave.
This year is the first year I do not have a celebration planned for July 11th. I can remember last year at this time waiting by the phone for him to call or come home. I left the outside lights on for three nights hoping he would return. His presents were wrapped and waiting. And he did eventually return home. With a broken shoulder from "body surfing with the guys." So is she the guy or the girl? I still haven't figured that part out yet.
So, today was just like any other day. Hilary and I went out to lunch, saw a movie and tried another ice cream place. There will be no singing Happy Birthday. Josh and Jocelyn will not be here to join us for a special dinner and there will be no presents to open. I guess that will be part of my new memories. July 11 will be just another day of the week.
Another difficult day. Today is my ex-husband's birthday. So hard to say, ex-husband. I can only suppose it will get easier with time, like all things.
Birthdays are very special days to me. When the kids were small I always made their bed on their birthday. It was the one chore I insisted they do before they left for school or camp ( couldn't stand an unmade bed ) but on their birthday I would do it for them. I would always cook their favorite dinner or let them pick their favorite restaurant and invariably we would have ice cream cake for dessert. We always sang Happy Birthday and had candles and wishes. I did the same for Dave.
This year is the first year I do not have a celebration planned for July 11th. I can remember last year at this time waiting by the phone for him to call or come home. I left the outside lights on for three nights hoping he would return. His presents were wrapped and waiting. And he did eventually return home. With a broken shoulder from "body surfing with the guys." So is she the guy or the girl? I still haven't figured that part out yet.
So, today was just like any other day. Hilary and I went out to lunch, saw a movie and tried another ice cream place. There will be no singing Happy Birthday. Josh and Jocelyn will not be here to join us for a special dinner and there will be no presents to open. I guess that will be part of my new memories. July 11 will be just another day of the week.
Tuesday, July 10, 2012
My Top Ten List
July 10, 2012
Top Ten Worst Things About Being Cheated On
10. Wondering if it happened in your home.
9. Wondering if it happened in your bed.
8. Finding bills for hotels you did not stay at on your credit card.
7. Worrying about STDs.
6. Trying to figure out how you were so clueless.
5. Questioning your faith in mankind.
4. Feeling rejected.
3. Having to tell your friends.
2. Having to tell your relatives.
1. Having to tell your children.
Top Ten Worst Things About Being Cheated On
10. Wondering if it happened in your home.
9. Wondering if it happened in your bed.
8. Finding bills for hotels you did not stay at on your credit card.
7. Worrying about STDs.
6. Trying to figure out how you were so clueless.
5. Questioning your faith in mankind.
4. Feeling rejected.
3. Having to tell your friends.
2. Having to tell your relatives.
1. Having to tell your children.
Monday, July 9, 2012
Marital Funds
July 9, 2012
One of my favorite places to shop used to be Super Walmart. Marshalls and TJ Maxx were my other favorites. I never bought anything unless it came from one of those stores or was on sale. No matter how much I wanted it. I shopped for bargains all the time.
So you can imagine my outrage when I realized my husband was supporting The "Big W" using marital funds. Another term I had never heard before going through divorce mediation. See what a learning experience this has been!
I already shared my obsessive monitoring of the credit cards and bank account. When I heard she couldn't find a place to live I realized he was moving to Long Island to support her. Why else leave our hospital subsidized apartment in Manhattan that was next door to his job? I found charges and checks from our joint accounts paying for rent, utilities, groceries, liquor, furniture and entertainment. When I angrily called him on it he responded, " I get to live, too." Yes, but does SHE also get to live off my hard work? He claimed she was paying for things. Like what? One day he even called and told me "they" were looking for an end table! Imagine him thinking that was an appropriate comment to share with his heart broken wife.
Be aware, ladies. Scrimping and saving will not do a thing for you when negotiating for alimony. Just like adultery, no one will care. I was told I did that willingly. And I did. But I did it so WE would be able to retire early and enjoy life together. Not so he could spend it supporting a confused "former" lesbian. I lived with broken shades in our bedroom, drove an old car, and always settled for second best. All in the spirit that we were a team, working toward a common goal. I never even had an engagement ring because we couldn't afford one when we got married.
Well, live and learn. I am more apt to treat myself. I recently purchased my first Coach purse with my OWN credit card. Ok, so I bought it from the outlet store and it was on sale, but still!
One of my favorite places to shop used to be Super Walmart. Marshalls and TJ Maxx were my other favorites. I never bought anything unless it came from one of those stores or was on sale. No matter how much I wanted it. I shopped for bargains all the time.
So you can imagine my outrage when I realized my husband was supporting The "Big W" using marital funds. Another term I had never heard before going through divorce mediation. See what a learning experience this has been!
I already shared my obsessive monitoring of the credit cards and bank account. When I heard she couldn't find a place to live I realized he was moving to Long Island to support her. Why else leave our hospital subsidized apartment in Manhattan that was next door to his job? I found charges and checks from our joint accounts paying for rent, utilities, groceries, liquor, furniture and entertainment. When I angrily called him on it he responded, " I get to live, too." Yes, but does SHE also get to live off my hard work? He claimed she was paying for things. Like what? One day he even called and told me "they" were looking for an end table! Imagine him thinking that was an appropriate comment to share with his heart broken wife.
Be aware, ladies. Scrimping and saving will not do a thing for you when negotiating for alimony. Just like adultery, no one will care. I was told I did that willingly. And I did. But I did it so WE would be able to retire early and enjoy life together. Not so he could spend it supporting a confused "former" lesbian. I lived with broken shades in our bedroom, drove an old car, and always settled for second best. All in the spirit that we were a team, working toward a common goal. I never even had an engagement ring because we couldn't afford one when we got married.
Well, live and learn. I am more apt to treat myself. I recently purchased my first Coach purse with my OWN credit card. Ok, so I bought it from the outlet store and it was on sale, but still!
Sunday, July 8, 2012
Guest Blog: Walnut Beach Creamery, a revised opinion
Guest blog by Josh Graboff, "the son," and author of the book of short stories Amalric Ogusson and the Fimbul Queen.
I went to Walnut Beach Creamery on my mother's advice. I can't believe she rated it so lowly in comparison to the other ice cream shops in the state! Jocelyn and I went together on our way back to New Jersey. The little community out there on the beach is quaint and well-maintained. The Sound actually looked attractive from the beach, and there are a number of little shops and restaurants right within walking distance.
Already, this is a step up from Wentworth's which, until we went to Walnut Beach, had been the standard by which we judged all other ice-cream. Wentworth's is on a busy highway and not really within walking distance of anything except a church, a masonic lodge, and a graveyard. There certainly aren't any little cottages on their own plots nearby.
So, when we got inside and discovered there were an amazing number of strange and delicious flavors (the lavender-fig was just the beginning of the list: I had Sandman, a peanut-butter ice-cream with chocolate covered graham crackers interspersed through it and Jocelyn had some lavender-fig and some carrot cake) that was just a bonus on top of the area.
The ice cream was creamy, there was no ice (as my mother has already made clear, ice in ice-cream is a major faux-paus. It is, essentially, the worst thing that can be done to the food), the flavors were varied, creative, and delicious. However, the real star of the show was none of those things. It wasn't even the beautiful area. It was, in fact, the pretzel cones that were hand-made and hand-shaped.
The salt on the cone elevated the ice-cream to a whole new realm. It was more delicious than I can begin to describe, and yet it remained crunchy throughout and was absolutely the best once the ice-cream above the level of the cone was gone.
I rebut my mother's review; indeed, I believe that Walnut Beach Creamery is the best ice-cream in the state and easily among the best ice-cream I've ever had anywhere. I can easily say, with no qualms and no reservations at all, that Walnut Beach Creamery is in fact, a solid and unabashed 10.
I went to Walnut Beach Creamery on my mother's advice. I can't believe she rated it so lowly in comparison to the other ice cream shops in the state! Jocelyn and I went together on our way back to New Jersey. The little community out there on the beach is quaint and well-maintained. The Sound actually looked attractive from the beach, and there are a number of little shops and restaurants right within walking distance.
Already, this is a step up from Wentworth's which, until we went to Walnut Beach, had been the standard by which we judged all other ice-cream. Wentworth's is on a busy highway and not really within walking distance of anything except a church, a masonic lodge, and a graveyard. There certainly aren't any little cottages on their own plots nearby.
So, when we got inside and discovered there were an amazing number of strange and delicious flavors (the lavender-fig was just the beginning of the list: I had Sandman, a peanut-butter ice-cream with chocolate covered graham crackers interspersed through it and Jocelyn had some lavender-fig and some carrot cake) that was just a bonus on top of the area.
The ice cream was creamy, there was no ice (as my mother has already made clear, ice in ice-cream is a major faux-paus. It is, essentially, the worst thing that can be done to the food), the flavors were varied, creative, and delicious. However, the real star of the show was none of those things. It wasn't even the beautiful area. It was, in fact, the pretzel cones that were hand-made and hand-shaped.
The salt on the cone elevated the ice-cream to a whole new realm. It was more delicious than I can begin to describe, and yet it remained crunchy throughout and was absolutely the best once the ice-cream above the level of the cone was gone.
I rebut my mother's review; indeed, I believe that Walnut Beach Creamery is the best ice-cream in the state and easily among the best ice-cream I've ever had anywhere. I can easily say, with no qualms and no reservations at all, that Walnut Beach Creamery is in fact, a solid and unabashed 10.
Tuesday, July 3, 2012
Fireworks
I am on vacation this week. This is the week I chose last September with my then-husband. For the past several years we had been going to the fireworks in Manhattan. Bringing chairs and a picnic supper to sit on the West Side Highway (which is closed) and waiting for the Macy's fireworks to start. It was going to be a new tradition for us. Or so I thought.
I have always loved fireworks. We went almost every year to the Hamden fireworks display. I still remember the first year we went. The kids were small and we went early to listen to the music and of course, to eat. I didn't think the display could rival those I grew up with in New Haven or West Haven. How could you have fireworks that were not on the beach? But they were awesome! I was so excited! It seemed as though we were right underneath them. I was very vocal in my appreciation much to my kids' dismay. We went every year after that until they were too big to come with us. Then we went alone. I remember once telling them that even when I am old and infirm I want one of them to take me to the fireworks every Fourth of July.
I forgot about the Hamden fireworks this year. Well, maybe I didn't forget but I didn't go. I almost drove there to watch from my car but I couldn't bring myself to even do that. Friends have called as each holiday passed. You have made it through your first Christmas, New Years, Easter. But this holiday is the one that hurts the most. I am a summer person and I love being outside on my beach chair, drinking wine and eating outdoors, maybe listening to music or waiting for the fireworks to start.
My friend Annie gave me a plant that we call the fireworks plant. I have it in a pot in front of my garage where I see it every time I go in and out of my house. It makes me smile every time I look at it. I think that is as close as I'll get to the fireworks this year.
I have always loved fireworks. We went almost every year to the Hamden fireworks display. I still remember the first year we went. The kids were small and we went early to listen to the music and of course, to eat. I didn't think the display could rival those I grew up with in New Haven or West Haven. How could you have fireworks that were not on the beach? But they were awesome! I was so excited! It seemed as though we were right underneath them. I was very vocal in my appreciation much to my kids' dismay. We went every year after that until they were too big to come with us. Then we went alone. I remember once telling them that even when I am old and infirm I want one of them to take me to the fireworks every Fourth of July.
I forgot about the Hamden fireworks this year. Well, maybe I didn't forget but I didn't go. I almost drove there to watch from my car but I couldn't bring myself to even do that. Friends have called as each holiday passed. You have made it through your first Christmas, New Years, Easter. But this holiday is the one that hurts the most. I am a summer person and I love being outside on my beach chair, drinking wine and eating outdoors, maybe listening to music or waiting for the fireworks to start.
My friend Annie gave me a plant that we call the fireworks plant. I have it in a pot in front of my garage where I see it every time I go in and out of my house. It makes me smile every time I look at it. I think that is as close as I'll get to the fireworks this year.
Monday, July 2, 2012
We all scream for ice cream
July is my favorite month. My birthday is in July. So is my son's and my mother's was also. My ex husband was born in July. Two of my very good friends have children with July birthdays. And my anniversary would have been July 31st. Is there a name for your wedding anniversary after you are divorced? Or do you start marking the anniversary of your divorce? Maybe June 22 will become my new anniversary.
The memories of last July have made me determined to make the most of this month. In January, Annie told me things would be better by my birthday. Not anywhere near totally better, but a little better. I didn't believe her then but I guess she was right. So today I want to write about something fun.
Last month Connecticut Magazine wrote an article about the best ice cream parlors in the state. I told Hilary I was going to visit all of them. Ice cream is my number one dessert. In fact I could go without dessert if not for ice cream. Wentworths, in Hamden, makes the best ice cream, in my opinion. So I have judged the others by them. Today Josh, Jocelyn and I went to Dr. Mikes in Bethel. We ate lunch at The Sycamore, an old fashioned diner with car hop service. We all had the Dagwood, a burger with all kinds of condiments, and their famous root beer in frosted mugs. Then off to my ice cream tasting.
Dr. Mikes is a tiny shop. You can not eat inside but they have benches outside. I had the chocolate lace, which is their best seller. It was delicious. Josh's coffee ice cream was flavorful but it had ice crystals. Jocelyn had a malted which was just ok. The selection of flavors was small so because of that and the icy texture of the coffee flavor we rated that a 7.5. Wentworths is to me a 9.5 (going on the theory that nothing is perfect).
A few weeks ago Hilary and I went to Walnut Beach Creamery. Their ice cream was great! Almost as good as Wentworths. In fact maybe as good. I will have to try it again to be sure! It was also a very tiny shop and I had my doubts when we arrived. But it was wonderful. The flavor selection was large and unusual. I had lavender fig in a pretzel cone. My daughter had cupcake. The pretzel cone alone is worth the trip back.
We have also tried A.C. Petersen in West Hartford. They are a full service restaurant serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. If you go there you have to try the frips. A cross between french fries and chips. They also had lots of flavors but we were not that impressed with the ice cream. Not enough to go back there again unless its for the frips. Rating 5.
The UCONN Dairy Bar was also very good. Not as good as Walnut Beach or Wentworths but we rated them an 8.5. The ice cream was rich and creamy but not many exotic flavors. There was lots of
room to eat inside or out and they also sold eggs and milk from their livestock.
As you can see I am eating again. Life does indeed go on. I can still find pleasure in an ice cream cone.
The memories of last July have made me determined to make the most of this month. In January, Annie told me things would be better by my birthday. Not anywhere near totally better, but a little better. I didn't believe her then but I guess she was right. So today I want to write about something fun.
Last month Connecticut Magazine wrote an article about the best ice cream parlors in the state. I told Hilary I was going to visit all of them. Ice cream is my number one dessert. In fact I could go without dessert if not for ice cream. Wentworths, in Hamden, makes the best ice cream, in my opinion. So I have judged the others by them. Today Josh, Jocelyn and I went to Dr. Mikes in Bethel. We ate lunch at The Sycamore, an old fashioned diner with car hop service. We all had the Dagwood, a burger with all kinds of condiments, and their famous root beer in frosted mugs. Then off to my ice cream tasting.
Dr. Mikes is a tiny shop. You can not eat inside but they have benches outside. I had the chocolate lace, which is their best seller. It was delicious. Josh's coffee ice cream was flavorful but it had ice crystals. Jocelyn had a malted which was just ok. The selection of flavors was small so because of that and the icy texture of the coffee flavor we rated that a 7.5. Wentworths is to me a 9.5 (going on the theory that nothing is perfect).
A few weeks ago Hilary and I went to Walnut Beach Creamery. Their ice cream was great! Almost as good as Wentworths. In fact maybe as good. I will have to try it again to be sure! It was also a very tiny shop and I had my doubts when we arrived. But it was wonderful. The flavor selection was large and unusual. I had lavender fig in a pretzel cone. My daughter had cupcake. The pretzel cone alone is worth the trip back.
We have also tried A.C. Petersen in West Hartford. They are a full service restaurant serving breakfast, lunch and dinner. If you go there you have to try the frips. A cross between french fries and chips. They also had lots of flavors but we were not that impressed with the ice cream. Not enough to go back there again unless its for the frips. Rating 5.
The UCONN Dairy Bar was also very good. Not as good as Walnut Beach or Wentworths but we rated them an 8.5. The ice cream was rich and creamy but not many exotic flavors. There was lots of
room to eat inside or out and they also sold eggs and milk from their livestock.
As you can see I am eating again. Life does indeed go on. I can still find pleasure in an ice cream cone.
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